I am drinking.......This morning I was driving and started crying. I just broke down crying. I missed DT and I still do. When I woke up I weighed 159lbs(72.12kgs) and all day the scale has stayed the same it actually went up to 160lbs (72.57kgs) for a little bit. I don't know if I am about to start my period or what but this and the fact that DT and I still aren't talking drove me to drinking. My wrist itch from the cuts ugh. I must be about to start my period I am being such a drama queen. I miss the boy. And this military man a is nice but its like I love and miss DT. How am I supposed to have any type of feelings for you when I am thinking about another man. Am I ever going to fucking get over it? I want to call him. I want to drive to see him drop everything and drive out to see him. I want him to hold me like before. I always felt safe when he held me. Almost like I trusted him. But I didn't because that stupid bastard is a cheater. You can never trust a cheater. I just want to call him now. I want him to call me. I know he won't though I told him I would change my number. So as long as he thinks I changed it he won't call me. Military man a did a good job today at distracting me. We have stopped texting and now all I can think about is DT. oksy I am really drunk now and teting military man a night night. Too bad he is a plane ride away. I would want sex right now!!!!
thinspo tomorow love yalllllllllllll
Aw *hugs* it's okay. Whether or not you are about to start your period it's okay. You will get past this eventually. And it's okay to take it slow when getting into new relationships, it takes a while to forget about the ones you have cared about in the past but when you're ready it can be a good idea to try and make a gentle but conscious effort to forget about the past. In any event, I wish you the best. And I love that Tupac song, it is so beautiful and I really wish people would take it to heart.
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I hope you're ok. And Tai is right, you will get over it, you will be able to move on but it'll take a bit more time for that to happen. I would say, for now, take things as they come and every day, little by little push the past away.
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oh hunni!! just finished catching up on your blog, you've had an already lively spring well done for seeing the (fat) fifties i hope to see that figure soon as its taken me well over 5months to bounce between the low sixties and eighties. Here's to seeing the forties on the scales soon .... for both of us. ps i think i may grab hold of this boiled egg a day idea, cheap and cheerful weightloss lool xxxx
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